Sunday, February 14, 2010

Broken Promises

Once again the time has rolled around to valentines day. The wonderful day that consist of girl friends bonding together to help lift each others spirit's in the loneliness of this holiday. Their are those of us who mock this day with bitterness and pain. others who are in love and chose to spend this holiday with happiness gifts on feelings. I on the other had decided to stay optimistic and show all my friends happy positive thoughts with a good attitude. Yes I can pretend to be happy and joking but deep down in side the thoughts of one boy, one broken heart, one memories of past words, promises that were never fulfilled seem to stick around the back of my mind. Today I was determined not to let these thoughts or emotions control my life. I has been 2 years I need to move on...... SO I pushed through smiling and laughing. Until the end of the night when all is said and done it came time to face the box of letters. This box contains every memories, thoughts, promises, or hope that was let down. I began reading these memories to discover for the first time a new emotion. I am not writing this person segment of my life for pity; but to mark the day that I am able to over come my past feelings and finally move on. As I read and read, pains of sorrow and lost hopes no longer filled my heart but feeling of joy, and love over came me with the comfort of know that one time in my life someone truly did love me. This person was there when I needed them to help me develop the faith that it is possible to love and be loved. Loves is something I have always had a hard time believing in. I now can say that the pain gets less and less and one day I will have some that will love me for time and eternity..... but for now I am excited for the next heart break that will lead me one step closer to finding that one. :)


  1. Have you seen 500 days of Summer. We just rented it. Brigitte has it. While I don't like all the swearing it has a good message. I don't think rereading his letters is the best way to let him go. I think you are remembering all the good things and maybe you should look back at realize all the reason's you don't want to be with him. I saw this quote on someones facebook and I am going to totally screw it up but you'll get the point. If you like 75% of someone hold on tight. forgive the other 25% that you don't like. Chances are there is 25% about you that you would like forgiven. So while you are dating focus on the 75%. When you break up, focus on the 25% that you didn't like ;) Rereading old letters from someone who was a jerk to you in the end, is not a way to get over someone. My advice is to stop looking back. Maybe you can finally see someone if you look forward. Love you. Thank you for the birthday present.

  2. Ya I was bored so I thought I would read them, planning to throw them away and I began reading. It was then that I discoverd I am not upset anymore, it was just a good feeling to relize I am complete over it. And I am just taking the good memories and moving on. But thanks that is a really good quote. I am not sad at all but hopeful. I really did like him one time but I feel so free now that I now know what I want and can finally put it to rest! THanks I love you